amygdala

the anthem

 guess you could say
I'm one of those girls
thats always been with one of those guys
you know the type
like right now
he sleeps while I write

it's better than crying
i'm worn out from trying
 from loving a man who always makes it clear
I'm not welcome here
Just when he's hungry or frisky or needs something cleaned
you know what I mean
But not tonight
Cause come the morning light

I'm gonna love myself
More than anyone else
Believe in me
Even if someone can't see
A stronger woman in me

I'm gonna be my own best friend
Stick with me till the end
Won't lose myself again
never, no
Cause theres a stronger woman
a stronger woman, stronger woman in me

the light bulbs buzz I get up
head to my drawer
wish there was more
I could say
another fairy tale fades to grey

I've lived on hope
like a child
walking that mile
faking that smile
all the while
wishing my heart had wings
well from now on I'm gonna be
The kind of woman I want my daughter to be, oh


I'm gonna love myself
More than anyone else
Believe in me
Even if someone can't see
A stronger woman in me

I'm gonna be my own best friend
Stick with me till the end
Won't lose myself again
never, no
Cause there's a stronger woman
a stronger woman

this is me, packing up my bags
this is me, headed for the door
this is me, the best you ever had

I'm gonna love myself
More than anyone else
Believe in me, even if someone can't see
The stonger woman in me

I'm gonna be my own best friend
stick with me till the end
Won't lose myself again
no no
Cause there's a stronger woman, a stronger woman
Theres a stronger woman in me, a stronger woman in me
stronger woman in me

these are a few of favorite things...

things within the past few days that have made me happy...

10. mechanical bull riding on a saturday night

9. waking up at 5am and watching the sun rise with a cup of coffee

8. cruising down the 10 singing "without love" with best friends

7. watching afroman and all of pc sing "because i got high" on a tuesday afternoon with blooms of smoke and intermittent wiffs of good ol' mary jane passing by

6. gucci sunglasses

5. waldorf and tofu salads

4. urth cafe and all its organic goodness

3. sprinkles red velet cupcakes

2. walking down melrose on a crisp yet sunny LA day

1. midterms being overrrr...

"be who you are and say what you mean, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"

oh Dr. Seuss how you speak to my soul.

i thought i graduated middle school already...

i used to resent G for her cruelty to me in 7th grade.  i was not aware that my presence offended her enough to corner me one lunch period and verbally bully me until the bell rang and i was sufficiently in tears.  but i will give G this; that girl had "balls" [in a proverbial sense of course].  she had the guts to look down at me straight in the eye for 5 minutes and tell me that "everyone thought i was a bitch".

it was a tough toss up between who had screwed me over more; my friends who called me a bitch and a whore (?i didn't get my first kiss until i was 17?) in the 6th grade behind my back

 or

dear G, with her thick glasses that followed the overall thickness of her body and black locks of hair who at least had the decency to call me such rude and obnoxious things to my face

i never quite appreciated the "balls" that G had; sure, she was rude and tactless but it's my belief that if you have a problem with someone/something, it's better to lay it out on the table.  i'm not saying that its appropriate to be tactless but let's be honest and discrete.  but to write notes, to mumble things beneath your breath when you think no one can hear you, to gossip amongst others cruel and malicious words, is immature and cowardly. 

people need to grow up; if you call someone a friend, than be one.  if you don't, than you should have the maturity to treat them like a human with respect.  i thought i already graduated middle school, i guess i was mistaken...